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Band 7

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
This
 bar chart illustrates the amount of
electricity
 which was used for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
production
 and consumption by
top
Correct article usage
the top
show examples
 ten countries (
China
, United States , Russia , Japan, India, Canada, France, Brazil, Germany,
Korea
Correct word choice
and Korea
show examples
) in 2014.
Overall
,
China
 ranks first for the consumption and
production
 of
electricity
 ,
moreover
, the lowest amount is used and produced by the country
Korea
.
Additionally
 , Russia was nearly equal in the
production
 and consumption of
electricity
. In 2014 ,
China
 was ahead of all the countries in
production
 which was 5,398 billion
kWh
 and
also
, for the usage of
electricity
 which was 5,322 billion
kWh
. The lowest amount of
electricity
 consumed is by the country
Korea
 which is 455.8 billion
kWh
 ,
moreover
,
electricity
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was produced by Germany in a minority which is about 526.6 . There was not a quite difference between the usage and manufacturing of
electricity
 by the country Russia which was about 19
kWh
 and
similarly
this
 was with countries
such
 as
China
 and
Korea
.
Submitted by manasiparmar97 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, production, china, korea, kwh with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic flow
  • road access
  • ring road
  • bus stops
  • bus station
  • congestion
  • parking facilities
  • pedestrian crossings
  • vehicular flow
  • organizational structure
  • accessibility
  • enhancements
  • configuration
  • dedicated
  • diverting traffic
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