Some people believe that music should be taught in schools, while others think that it is best to focus on computer and science. Discuss both views and your opinion.

#people #music #schools #focus #computer #science

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It is argued that

music

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should be included in

schools

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curriculum whilst others disagree and believe that it is beneficial to focus only on

science

Use synonyms

and

computer

Use synonyms

This

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essay agrees that subjects like

computer

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and

science

Use synonyms

are important to children but the school cannot neglect the benefits of

music

Use synonyms

To begin

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with, in

this

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21st century, technological subjects are key to make kids smart.

In other words

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, worlds,

this

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is an era of

science

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and technology and if the

schools

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do not focus on these areas

then

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the pupils fall behind other students in learning new technology.

Moreover

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, almost of the works are done on

computer

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nowadays and

science

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helps the children to put on their experiment hat rather than wasting their time on

music

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lessons.

For example

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, many scientists have predicted that the world would be transformed completely into

computer

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operated through

science

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discoveries by 2050.

Hence

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, if

schools

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do not concentrate on

science

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and

computer

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now, the children will not be able to get good employment in the future.

However

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, many disagree and believe that

music

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is as important as

science

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and

computer

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Music

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help individuals to relax and release the pressure.

This

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is to say that many pupils enjoy

music

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and are happy when they play any instrument or sing a song.

Furthermore

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music

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also

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plays a great role in the cognitive development of a child and brain development. To exemplify, according to research conducted by scientists, people who learned

music

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in their early period are smarter than other people when they become adult. To conclude, many individuals think that

schools

Use synonyms

should only focus on

computer

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and

science

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subjects so that they can be competent in the future but

this

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essay agrees that

music

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is equally important in

schools

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for the cognitive development.

Submitted by shresthakrishchal on Sun Feb 07 2021

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Some people believe that music should be taught in schools, while others think that it is best to focus on computer and science. Discuss both views and your opinion.

Your opinion

Crime appears to be rising in most countries in the world, especially among young people. Identify the possible causes of this trend, and propose some solutions you think would be effective.

Many people argue that smoking should be banned due to its harmful effects on human health. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of people to take care of the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment what damage does plastics do to the environment What can be done by government and individuals to solve this problem

Some museums and art galleries charge admission fees, while others offer free entry. In my opinion, the benefits of free admission outweigh the drawbacks.