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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The manufacturing and use of cars damages the environment but their popularity is increasing why is this happening how could this be controlled?

#cars #damages #environment #popularity #be
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Car
 usage has been ubiquitous lately.
However
, thought that their manufacture and utilizing has negative impacts on the environment. In
this
 essay, I will explain the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
 phenomena and suggest some solutions to tackle
this
proble
Correct your spelling
problem
.
To begin
 with,
cars
 are popular
die
Correct your spelling
due
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 some reasons. One of which is that they save time. To illustrate,
people
 used to spend much time to
travel
 from
place
Correct pronoun usage
one place
show examples
 to another using old travelling methods like camels and horses. Whereas, after the invention of
cars
such
 distance
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 cut within
few
Add an article
a few
show examples
 hours.
For example
, in order to
travel
 from
cairo
Change the capitalization
Cairo
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 to Alexandria in Egypt it may take 4 days minimum , but bt
car
 it takes maximum
4
Change preposition
of 4
show examples
 hours. another reason is that
cars
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
 more privacy while travelling.
This
 is because when
people
travel
 by
car
 nobody can
recongnise
Correct your spelling
recognise
 them or see what they have inside the
car
 especially with the dark windows.
Furthermore
,
people
 can
travel
 anywhere whenever they like without others even noticing them.
However
,
cars
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
 the environment badly, and
this
 can be solved
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 many ways. One of which is that the government can invest in developing
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
 public transport
such
 as buses and subways.
Consequently
,
people
 will shift to using
such
 vehicles and eventually minimizing the load on environmental pollution. Another way to tackle the problem is by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
building
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ofbuilding
show examples
 a railway system with different levels to
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
 all community layers.
Such
system
Correct article usage
a system
show examples
 can be provided by
super speed
Add a hyphen
super-speed
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 trains that can link all the country’s regions together.
For instance
,
Kingdom
Correct article usage
the Kingdom
show examples
 of Saudi Arabia has now built a railway line between Meccan and Madina, which are the most vital cities during Haj and
Ommra
Correct your spelling
Amara
 seasons there,
this
 has saved a huge amount of
thime
Correct your spelling
time
 and effort for its visitors and
also
 greatly decreased the pressure on
car
 usage. Overall,
although
cars
 are widely used due to their saving
tine
Correct your spelling
time
show examples
 and privacy, they damage the environment.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 the government should provide the country with other effective
ulternatives
Correct your spelling
alternatives
such
 as public transport and trains.
Submitted by rafaianasr91 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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