IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

#countries #people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport
The transportation industry has been increasing so rapidly, so we can travel anywhere even though we don't have our car or we don't drive.
Trains
 make us visit a city that placed far from our home town easily. We can take not only the
train
 but
also
 the buses and the subways. I'm going to discuss what is more important to us either constructing a new railway or improving existing public
transport
. Some
people
 think spending large amounts of money on making a new railway for the fast
train
 is important. These days, we have many options to choose
when
Change preposition
from when
show examples
 we visit a city that far from our hometown. The
train
 is one of the popular vehicles to be chosen. Of course, we can take a plane, but it is expensive than the
train
 and the price is not fixed.
Therefore
, constructing as many railways as possible makes
people
 more convenient to travel and
also
 helps saving money.
Although
 making fast
trains
 is important, some
people
 think improving existing public
transport
 is more worth than the fast
trains
. Fast
trains
 are only for the
people
 who want to travel far away, but a majority of
people
 use public transportation in their daily life,
such
 as a bus, a
train
, and the subway.
Thus
, the lack of public
transport
 can cause inconvenience. In my opinion, many options of public
transport
 are more important than fast
trains
. Because, fast
trains
 might be cheaper than aircraft, but increasing speed means it needs high technology.
Therefore
 the price of the
trains
 should be increased and if it happens, not the many citizens are able to use.
Submitted by Hailey Ryu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: