IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

After finishing school, some students go travelling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think the advantages of gap years outweigh the disadvantages?

#school #students #work #period #time #university #gap #years
Nowadays many young people opt for travelling or working for one
year
 before going to
university
. In my opinion, the benefits of a gap
year
 outweigh the drawbacks. The main advantage of taking a period of
time
 after finishing high school to work is that they can save money for
university
. Many parents can not afford the high expenses of their children once they go to college since there are many costs involved
such
 as tuition, books and housing.
Consequently
, students can end up with a huge amount of debt when they graduate because they needed to take loans to finish their
studies
.
This
 could be avoided if they decide to work for a while before entering
university
. Another benefit of a gap
year
 is that the student has more
time
 to decide which field they want to study. Most people who graduate high school do not have a clue about their future and which profession would be the best for them.
As a result
, having
this
 extra
time
 to think and experience different jobs can give them a better view of what they really want and help them to make a more mature decision about their lives.
However
, individuals who do not go to
university
 immediately will need more
time
 to finish their
studies
.
This
 sense of being left behind and seeing their friends graduating before they can be devastating.
Therefore
, it can lower their confidence and lead them to miss many opportunities because they will finish their
studies
 later than most people. In conclusion, I reaffirm my opinion that the benefits of a gap
year
such
 as saving money to pay for their
studies
 and having more
time
 to decide which field they want to specialize in outweigh the disadvantage of finishing
university
 a little bit older than others.
Submitted by eduardamallmann on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: