The young today spend a large amount of their leisure time in shopping centers. It is feared that this trend can bring negative influences on the youths and the society. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this view? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is noted that the young today spend a large amount of their leisure
time
in shopping
centers
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centres
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. Parents fear that
this
can bring
negative
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a negative
show examples
influence on the youth and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. I strongly agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
notion and I will put forward my views in the following paragraphs. It is a generally accepted thought that the
youths
are the
corner stone
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cornerstone
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of
a
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apply
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society, they are the future generation that
shape
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shapes
show examples
a modern community
besides
that the development of a country is based on how good it can raise its
youths
. When the younger ones spend more
time
in shopping
malls
, they are wasting their
time
wandering around the place without any particular
thooughts
Correct your spelling
thoughts
thought
or aims.
For example
, when a youth spends more
time
in
malls
rather than spending the
time
for education or extra
caricular
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curricular
activities, it will hinder their brain development.
Moreover
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,Moreover
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shopping
malls
are a place where
large
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a large
the large
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number of people from different backgrounds and
intrests
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interests
meets. The young ones might be vulnerable in
such
a situation as they are not properly trained to avoid
such
toxic individuals. Another thing that can affect them
are
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is
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the
food
that
are
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is
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available in shopping
malls
. In a shopping mall
for
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,for
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example, the main attraction for the
youths
are
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is
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the
fast
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fast-food
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food
joints. These
food
items will affect their taste for eating healthy
food
and affect their health. To summarize the above
paraghraphs
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paragraphs
paragraph
, I can strongly agree that
youths
spending more
time
in a shopping mall will bring negative influence on themselves and society.
Submitted by neethuchackochan on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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