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Band 6.5

In many parts of the world, children are given more freedom than in the past. Is this a pisitive or a negative development?

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Nowadays children have more freedom than in the earlier time. In my opinion, it is a positive development because it has more advantages as compared to disadvantages. Children get the chance to obtain more benefits, who enjoy their life independently. They grow up quicker than their
parents
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. Today's youth is well informed about everything and always remains ready to explore new things. They know the information, which is unknown to their elder.
Additionally
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, they follow the global culture, which has many positive impacts on society for a long time.
Besides
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,
this
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 opportunity develops more adventurous, liberal and mature adults . Today's new generation is in the favour of new trends. To illustrate, they prefer dowry free marriage and go against all the negative point of view about it whereas in the past
people
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 considered it normal.
Furthermore
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, today's youngster has the power of the internet and access to satellite tv. They are ready to take risks.
Moreover
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, in difficult ,situations they are helped by their
parents
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, friends and teachers.They take part in all activities and chose subjects of their interest.
However
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,
parents
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 do not pressurize them to join medical, non-medical, engineering and other courses.
Consequently
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, destudents select new fields
such
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 as computer animations, information technology.
On the other hand
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, it has many detrimental effects. Sometimes teens are unable to recognise the bad company of
people
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, which may create problems for them. For
this
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 reason, they must take the necessary awareness from their
parents
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 and grandparents. The use of narcotic drugs is very common these days and many
people
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 become addicted to them.
Moreover
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, children spend plenty of time with their friends and do not with the
people
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, who care for them a lot. To conclude, freedom has many merits while
also
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 some demerits but the positive side outweighs the downside .

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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