IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

International tourism is now more common than ever before. Some feel it is a positive trend but others don’t. Give your opinion.

#tourism #feel #trend #don’t
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Travelling to other countries for leisure and holiday is becoming increasingly popular these days. Some
people
Use synonyms
 consider
this
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 to be a good thing.
However
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, a part of society is opposed to
this
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 trend, claiming that it has several negative implications. In the following paragraphs, I’d like to express my viewpoint.
Tourism
Use synonyms
 is part and parcel of human culture. It is critical to the country’s economy because it generates a fair amount of employment and brings invaluable foreign currency. There are a few countries,
such
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 as Hong Kong, Maldives and Thailand, where
tourism
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 contributes a significant amount of their GDP, and
as a result
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, nations encourage
tourism
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 to boost their economies.
Besides
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this
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, with the advancement of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 international travellers contribute many ways to social and cultural interaction by informing
people
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 about the
values
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 and traditions of other countries and bringing
people
Use synonyms
 around the globe together.
However
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, there is a subset of
people
Use synonyms
 who believe that global
tourism
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 has resulted in cultural dilution, deforestation and depletion of natural resources. When
people
Use synonyms
 from different cultures visit a country, they impose their
values
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 on the locals, causing a dent in local
values
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 and traditions.
For example
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, women with bikini are alien to orthodox and religious society. They feel it is an insult to their traditional and cultural
values
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.
Furthermore
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, uncontrolled
tourism
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 activities
has
Change the verb form
have
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 been linked to environmental damage. Coral reef damage in Australia, deforestation in Amazon for the shake of
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tourism
Add an article
the tourism
show examples
 industry is a good example of
this
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. In conclusion, while global
tourism
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 has caused some issues, I believe that the increase in international travel has resulted in many significant positive developments that have benefited nations.
Submitted by ars on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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