Some people think that government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

It was considered by
few
Add an article
a few

It appears that an article is missing before the word few. Consider adding the article.

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people that, expenses done on
arts
by the government are of no use.
However
,
this
money may help for the betterment of the country, if used on different critical projects. In
this
essay, I would like to state my opinion in support of the perspective that, better to spend on developmental
issues
than
arts
.
Firstly
,
Art
is considered as a form of entertainment whereas, there are many hazardous
issues
which people are dealing with, needs attention on priority basis than the entertainment.
For instance
, the recent covid pandemic spoiled every citizen's life, not only physically but
also
financially. The economy of the country has been collapsed for a year or so,
this
is the fact that its the only important issue that should be taken care
first
Change preposition
of first

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and foremost. Poverty, lack of food supply, deprivation from shelter and cloths should be dealt
with
Change preposition
with with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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economic support.
Hence
, If the cash is saved from the budget of entertainment, it will be much more useful for every individual.
Secondly
, employment opportunities statistics are negligible for
art
studies.
Nevertheless
, revenue generated by
art
events is not better than that of businesses or science projects.
This
again affects countries economy and eventually the pocket of
common
Add an article
the common

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man. Every person wants to live a self-sufficient life for themselves and their family. so enhancing the educational standards, specifically for the most earning fields like commerce, technology and science will be way more effective than focusing on
art
and its studies. The money could be utilized to provide scholarships for higher education for the students, like space researchers or medical and technological researchers.
Hence
the economy should be enhanced by paying attention to other important
issues
than
arts
. In conclusion, I would like to give my opinion that I am strongly in support of diverting the funds towards the vital
issues
of the country than spending on
arts
.
Submitted by drvaishalikhare on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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