IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The money spent on space research has brought enormous benefits to mankind,but it could be more specifically applied. How far do you agree?

#money #space #research #mankind
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Governments are spending an enormous amount on
space
Use synonyms
 research without understanding properly the pros and consequences of
this
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. I strongly agree with
this
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 because some
space
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 travels are
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
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 of money and other crucial areas of
the
Remove the article
apply
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society like education of common
people
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 should be focused
.
Change preposition
on.
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Firstly
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, some
space
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 travels are so expensive but the impact on the welfare of
universe
Correct article usage
the universe
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 is very less. For
space
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 travels,
space
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 rockets are required and professionals
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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could visit other
plantes
Correct your spelling
planets
plants
. They have to stay there for a longer period. Facilities that required are not cheap, the best
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
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 are needed.
Travel
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 can be successful and cannot be too. For the
purpose
Add a comma
,purpose
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 the
travel
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 is made, is
also
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 not sure to be achieved.
For instance
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, every year many scientists reach Mars to check the
possibilty
Correct your spelling
possibility
 of life there, but it is not proven yet.
Nevertheless
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,
amount
Add an article
the amount
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 spent on their
tarvel
Correct your spelling
travel
 is very huge for no good purpose.
Secodly
Correct your spelling
Secondly
, the world need education
first
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then
Linking Words
space
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 travels. The literacy rate worldwide is very less. Some developing countries' situation is deteriorating. These countries have
massive
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a massive
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 population of uneducated
people
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. These countries should focus on providing education facilities to the common public.
For example
Linking Words
, India is
spenting
Correct your spelling
spending
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
lot
 on
space
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travel
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 for a better reputation globally;
however
Linking Words
, it has
massive
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a massive
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 population of
people
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 with
low
Correct article usage
a low
show examples
 literacy rate.
Hence
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,
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instead
Add a comma
,instead
show examples
 spend millions on
space
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travel
Use synonyms
 which has very less impact on the welfare of society, authorities should focus on educating common
people
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. In conclusion,
space
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travel
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 cost a lot but
results
Correct article usage
the results
show examples
 are not always positive. I believe
although
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 it has a few benefits
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
these do not always have a
postivie
Correct your spelling
positive
 impact, many
space
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 travels were not successful and other weak sections of society like uneducated
people
Use synonyms
 should be taken care
.
Change preposition
of.
show examples
Submitted by Priya on

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