IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people believe that if a police officer carries guns, it can encourage a higher level of violence. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #police #officer #guns #level #violence
Some are on the view that when a Law enforcement
officer
possess
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possesses
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 a firearm on duty, it
stimulate
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stimulates
show examples
Correct article usage
an increase
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increase
Replace the word
increased
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 level of violence. I strongly disagree
to
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with
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 the above rather it
increase
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increases
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 the chance of
self protection
Add a hyphen
self-protection
show examples
 for the
officer
 and the security
for
Change preposition
of
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 the community. A
gun
 is issued to a
police
officer
 as a resemblance of authority and responsibility.
To begin
 with, any
police
officer
 will go through extensive training and education before receiving a
gun
 to active duty. As an example,
united
Correct article usage
the united
show examples
 kingdom
police
 force requires,an
officer
 to go through 2 years of
post qualification
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post-qualification
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 training on the job with a senior
officer
 to earn a firearm.
Moreover
,
this
 eventually
train
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trains
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 the
police
officer
the
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on the
show examples
 importance of using the
gun
 as and when needed to protect
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society from any threat which can harm the peace of the country. The current terrorist threats around the globe
needs
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need
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 extra measurement
,
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apply
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 when it comes to domestic security in countries.
Firstly
, any country will use the
police
 force as the
first
 point of contact to combat threats which ultimately requires the
police
officer
 to be equipped to handle any situation.
In addition
 to
this
, the
increase
 of domestic theft and burglary levels means that
police
officer
needs
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toneeds
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 act fast and needs to make sure that their life's
also
 is safe, and for
this
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
 it will help to
increase
 the
self protection
Add a hyphen
self-protection
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 of the
officer
it self
Correct your spelling
itself
show examples
. In conclusion,
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
 some people
feels
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feel
show examples
 that carrying a
gun
 by a
police
officer
increase
 the chance of having violence, it is quite evident that having a firearm by a trained and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsible
officer
 will only
increase
 the chance to mitigate
such
 unfortunate events in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by suhithakarunanayake on

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