IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays, a lot of information about medical conditions and illnesses is freely available on the internet. Is this a good thing or a bad thing for most people? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#information #conditions #illnesses #internet #people
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People can get a lot of things online about their medical problems or how to solve their illnesses. I think the drawbacks of
this
 outweigh the benefits. On the one hand, nowadays, technology has improved steadily. It means we can learn a lot of things about our
health
 on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. Giving an example, if one
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
strong
Add an article
a strong
show examples
 headache and does not the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
, one can write the symptoms on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 and can get the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
 issue, learn how to solve the headache.
On the other hand
, getting some information about our
health
 might a little bit awful for us.
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
What
Correct your spelling
That
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 means
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 we cannot know that everything we read is true and useful. We cannot believe it.
For instance
,
last
 year, scientists have
proof
Replace the word
proved
show examples
 that the trust fullness of something about our
health
 on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 is 37.5%. So, if somebody
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 a medicine that recommended on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
, it will probably be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 his
health
.
Therefore
, we have to
be believe
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
 only our
doctors
Change to a genitive case
doctor's
doctors'
show examples
 suggestions. To sum up,
although
 there are some advantages of learning something about our
health
, they are outweighed by disadvantages.
Submitted by anar.safarov on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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