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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think this is good for the country, while other believe that government should control the salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #people #salaries #country #government #control #limit #amount
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While some
people
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 believe that controlling payments could bring an affirmative effect in the
country
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, others believe that the ruling body should provide increased
salary
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 packages. In my opinion,
people
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 should be given high
pay checks
Correct your spelling
paychecks
show examples
accordingly
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 because of the risk and involvement that they show towards their job sacrificing their personal life.
To begin
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 with, earning high salaries in some areas could help those
people
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 to spend more which increase the revolution of the money cycle inside the
country
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.
As a result
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, more companies
emerges
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emerge
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 which in turn increases the employment rate in the
country
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 which eventually improves the productivity of that region.
For example
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, the United States followed
this
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 method which helped them to become the greatest power in the world. Due to their high
salary
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 packages, many
people
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 tend to take credit cards which helped not only the
governement
Correct your spelling
government
 but
also
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 small businesses to flourish.
Secondly
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,
people
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 who are receiving high paychecks are sacrificing their personal life to a great extent because of the unbearable pressure from their job.
On the other hand
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, some places make restrictions in controlling peoples
salary
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 because it could help
people
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 to save their money for future use.
In addition
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, it could prevent them from being a spendthrift.
A
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The
show examples
 best illustration is the tradition followed in India where the citizens would not spend a lot to lead a happy life
instead
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 they keep their treasure for their children.
As a result
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, the overall development of the
country
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 is limited.
Moreover
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, introducing rules to limit the amount a person could earn would eventually lead to
point
Add an article
a point
the point
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 where everyone in the
country
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 would be having
same
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the same
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salary
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 despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
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their superiority after a period of time which makes them less loyal to what they do in their career. To conclude, in my opinion, no regulations should be put forward to limit the amount that they receive in accordance with their job responsibilities as
their
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there
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 are a lot of
people
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 who works restlessly which have to be considered by the ruling body as well as by the institution where they work.
Submitted by Ashith on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealth inequality
  • economic growth
  • motivation
  • talent acquisition
  • consumer spending
  • tax revenue
  • redistributing wealth
  • market forces
  • income disparity
  • social stability
  • freedom of choice
  • meritocracy
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