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Band 4.5

Goverenment should spend more money on education than on recration and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

#goverenment #money #education #recration #sports
It is argued that the government should focus on investing a big amount of currency on improving the infrastructure of schools, colleges and universities rather than paying for Olympics games and for the renovation of the old buildings.In my opinion,
although
, it is important to maintain the
country
 heritage
such
 as buildings, roads and promote
the
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apply
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sports
 on an international level , the government should encourage the youth to do study and help the
country
 to become more advance and developed.
Young
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The young
A young
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 generation of every
country
play
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plays
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 a vital role in the development of the
country
 because they come up with new ideas and energy which they can
utilized
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utilize
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 in the growth not only of
business
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the business
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 sector but
also
 health, education, and technology. If each citizen of the
country
 is literate
than
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then
show examples
 they can find
the
Correct article usage
a
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 job easily and due to that unemployment rate is less because of that individuals can
fulfill
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fulfil
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 their needs.
As a
result
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,result
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 there is
low
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a low
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 chance of crime and robberies. To illustrates, in, most of the developed countries the population is well educated and have
a
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apply
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suitable jobs which help the nation to become economically strong.
However
, some people
believes
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believe
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 that it is better if the administration of the
country
 spent on
sports
 and new construction because ts
tow
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two
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 things
Correct pronoun usage
that represents
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represents
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represent
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 that how the
country
 is powerful and well built.
Besides
this
,
sports
also
 demonstrates their
country
 at
international
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the international
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 platform if authorities pay some amount as a reward for the players it will encourage them to perform well in the games
moreover
, they can
also
influenced
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influence
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 the youth of the
country
 to participate in various games. In
conculsion
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conclusion
, I feel that the government should do more towards funding
the
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apply
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education because if the people of the
countery
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country
 are well educated
than
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then
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 they can perform better
in
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on
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 any platform either it is
the
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apply
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sports
, business, or
as
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apply
show examples
a doctors
Correct the article-noun agreement
a doctor
doctors
show examples
.
Submitted by daisysharma0087 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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