Some people believe that it is wrong for professional athletes to compete in the Olympics because their strong financial backing and training give them an unfair advantage over the other athletes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #athletes #olympics #advantage

Some people that professional athletes have advantages due to their training so they should not compete in Olympics. I

also

agree with

this

because

profeesional

Correct your spelling

professional

professionals

have been through better training and

aware

Replace the word

awareness

show examples

of the practices to win the

game

Firstly

professionals

are trained and received proper guidance from the trainers. To be perfect at something it is mandatory to get training which these

professionals

are already taken. Competition should be between those who are equally trained but these

professionals

are

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

over qualified

Correct your spelling

overqualified

show examples

than others.

This

will be

Change the article

apply

show examples

unfair

practise

Correct your spelling

practice

show examples

if these

professionals

compete with beginners.

For instance

, a professional athlete

Change the verb form

goes

show examples

under

training

Add an article

the training

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

several years which other participants do not get.

Hence

, they are not as guided as

professionals

Secondly

, these

professionals

are completely

know

Replace the word

knowledgeable

show examples

Change preposition

about

show examples

the techniques to win the

game

. These are

professionals

and known to the tacts.

Add a hyphen

In-game

show examples

game

Add an article

the game

show examples

, there are

loop holes

Correct your spelling

loopholes

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

can be used for victory. Because these are playing

from

Change preposition

for

show examples

a number of years, they can easily use these techniques and beat the other candidates.

For instance

, they know where to speed up and where to slow down. These things help them to win easily from the non-

professionals

Therefore

, it is better if they do not take part in these. In conclusion,

professionals

are in advantage as they are guided and been through the required

trainings

Change the wording

training

pieces of training

show examples

. They are aware of all the techniques which

helps

Change the verb form

help

show examples

them to win the

game

. I

also

believe

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they have

benefits

Correct quantifier usage

more benefits

show examples

than

other candidate

Change the wording

another candidate

other candidates

show examples

so they should not take part in Olympics.

Submitted by Priya on Mon Apr 12 2021

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is wrong for professional athletes to compete in the Olympics because their strong financial backing and training give them an unfair advantage over the other athletes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays an increasing numbers of profession such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can done to solve this.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract more local people to these museums?

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?