IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some say that sports play an important role in the development of society. Others think it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#say #sports #role #development #society #leisure #activity
Many
people
 consider
sports
 to be a form of entertainment only.
Although
this
 idea seems plausible,
sports
 do stand out as a vital part of human society in
this
 day and age. From my perspective, the values that these physical
activities
 brought to humanity are concrete evidence that proves
sports
 are more than just regular recreational
activities
.
First
 and foremost, looking at the
first
 idea, doing physical
activities
 can release our stress and anxiety effectively. After a long day at work, playing
sports
 can help you to reduce your stress and relax. Especially for
people
 suffering from working pressure,
sports
 may be a good idea when they want to find means of entertainment. Normal physical
activities
also
 do not require any specific training or equipment.
Therefore
,
sports
 are often regarded simply as a form of leisure
activities
.
On the other hand
, sport is an international language that holds
people
 together. Despite the language barriers and differences in social backgrounds,
people
 all over the world can enjoy
sports
 in many ways, even when they are watching a group of
people
 playing football, or themselves participate in a
sports
 event.
Moreover
, players can express their passion, patriotism and lift up the country’s spirits through significant sporting events,
such
 as the World Cup.
Secondly
, playing
sports
 can bring many long-term health benefits. By taking up some
sports
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
 a regular trait,
people
 can maintain their well-being,
for example
, improve their quality of sleep, blood circulation and even strengthen their immune system.
Sports
also
 allow
people
 to build up their social skills and relationships.
For instance
, to become a good team player, we must have a deep understanding and connections among others as well, which is essential in our actual life. All things considered,
sports
 definitely play a crucial role in our society, as they bring us many beneficial pros in terms of entertainment, well-being and more.
Submitted by nhathoang.161286 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: