In some countries, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed their education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

#countries #adults #parents #education #jobs #outweigh

The issue of whether the children should live with their parents has been raising a lot of debates. Some might say that staying with family can bring adolescent beneficial effects on their growth

such

as develop their behaviour, make them feel happy and so on.

On the contrary

, others insist on the opinion that teenagers should move out of their home when they are 18 years old because it will make them become independent people. Viewing a general perspective, I personally agree with the former opinion for the following reasons.

To begin

with, living with parents can substantially help the child be cared for and taught by their mother and father.

Firstly

, young people’s behaviour can be improved when they live under education by family.

For example

, everyone sometimes does not know how to confront the problem and

this

leads to them having a bad reaction to it, but if they have their mother by their side they will be given the best advice,

therefore

they can develop their characters perfectly .,

Secondly

the child's spirit is very important for them , it helps them get far from stress and have a happy life.

For instance

, the youngsters who live with relations can share their dairy story or the trouble that they get through which releases their pressure and makes them feel more comfortable.

Finally

, to be alive with mother and father after graduating and finding jobs that cost no money for the children for accommodation or food, they can save money for themself in their activity.

On the other hand

, some people think that the kids should live apart from relations to practice necessary skills for their future and they need to become independent people to be their own themself because the parents can live with them forever .,

However

Add the comma(s)

,However

show examples

if the infants have security from their family is better than the other one In conclusion, adults who stay with mom and dad as long as they can have a beneficial effect than the others. They have a convenient and happy growth when living with their beloved.

Submitted by nguyenhoangbaochau870 on Tue Apr 27 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

346 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, more and more adults are continuing to live with their parents even after they have completed their education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness.Do you think people can be happy without much money?What other factors contribute toward happiness.

Every year millions of people move from the countryside to the city putting increasing strain on the urban environment. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualification and experience, to what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion with example.