All over the world societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem effects both children and adults. What are the reason for this rise in obesity. How could it be tackled?

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With the soaring rates of consumption of distinct cuisines every day, people are gaining more weight. Almost every nation is facing issues of

obesity

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which is due to numerous factors. Elaborating on the causes, panaceas will be elucidated in the following paragraphs. To commence with, in today's era children and adults are captivated to fast food than

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homemade meal.

Such

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street foods have high rates of fats and calories which make consumers lethargic.

As a result

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this

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fat keeps on accumulating in the body if not exercised to burn it and leads to

obesity

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For example

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, teenagers eat pizzas, burgers and ample unhealthy snack from the market. The stuff utilized in those is inappropriate for the sound body as well as nutritionless.

This

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is why they suffer from hazardous diseases

such

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as fatty liver and

obesity

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. Probing ahead, the taste of processed eatables is alluring to the child. They make them more addictive and start eating on daily basis. Since every obstacle comes with the solutions,

likewise

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this

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weight-gaining issue can be controlled if proper steps are followed.

Firstly

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, it is vital for parents to control the diet of the offspring. Consumption of junk eatables must be restricted at the early stages.

Initially

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, every household should develop the habit of eating a healthy aliment diet.

Secondly

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, the government can help to alleviate the barrier of weight gain among the natives by imposing high tariffs on surgery unhealthy

feedstuff

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foodstuff

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that will prevent them to ingest adulterated items. In conclusion, it is requisite to treat some diseases prior to become deadly and

obesity

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is one of them. It is righteous to say that prevention is better than cure because if we will not work on to healthy body both internally and externally

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repercussion will be catastrophic.

Submitted by simran211095 on Fri Apr 30 2021

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

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for instance
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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

295 words

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All over the world societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem effects both children and adults. What are the reason for this rise in obesity. How could it be tackled?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that governments should invest mainly in making public transportation faster while other think there are more important priorities (cost, the environment). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Overpopulation in many major urban centers around the world is a major problem. What are the causes of this? How can this problem be solved?

Some people think the government should subsidise fruit and vegetables to make healthy food more affordable. Others argue that the government should tax unhealthy food instead. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Your neighbour has animals and they cause noise. Write a letter - Describe the situation - Suggestion to solve the problem - Tell him what will you do if he will not solve the problem

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taugh to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.