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Band 5

Discipline is an ever increasing problem in modern schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers,while others think that this is a role of parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#discipline #schools #people #responsibility #teachers #role #parents
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Some people reckon that teachers are responsible for
discipline
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 in
schools
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 today; some others believe that students should learn
discipline
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by
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from
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 their families. Needless to say, nowadays,
discipline
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 has become a major problem in
schools
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. I reckon that the process of
discipline
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 learning starts
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
parents
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 and continuous in school; remember always
start
Correct article usage
the start
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 point has more importance. There are some people who believe that
discipline
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 should be learnt during the process of
education
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 by teachers and
parents
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 are not responsible for their
children
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's
behavior
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behaviour
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. In my opinion, teachers are responsible for
discipline
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 learning in
schools
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 especially primary
schools
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 but it doesn’t mean that family environment has no importance. According to the statistics, most of the young lawbreakers in
community
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the community
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 have grown up in an inappropriate environment in their family and they have continued their
education
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also
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;
therefore
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,
children
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 should learn
discipline
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 at home
first
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 and
then
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 complete their learning in school.
On the other hand
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, some individuals think that learning
discipline
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 is one of the duties of
a good
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good parent
good parents
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parents
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. According to the psychologist researches,
children
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 have a great potential to learn new things at their
first
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 ages before they go to school;
thus
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, if
parents
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 pay enough attention to learning
discipline
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 to their
children
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 before they start their
education
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, it will be more effective than any other time. In conclusion,
parents
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 and
schools
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 have considerable duties to learn
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discipline
Add an article
the discipline
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 to pupils and
children
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 and both of them have own role. Eventually, I reckon that learning
discipline
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 is one of the good
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parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
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 duties and
children
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 should know
discipline
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 before they begin their
education
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 process; meanwhile,
schools
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also
Linking Words
 have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 role in learning
discipline
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.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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