IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It is impossible to help all people around the world in need so governments should focus on people from their own country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #world #governments #focus #country
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often true that receiving funds from international communities may not be a feasible solution for the issues of
economically-deprived
Correct your spelling
economically deprived
show examples
 nations.
Therefore
, they should find a solution with the help of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 own citizens. I, completely, agree with
this
 statement , for
this
, people require to find the root cause of the issue and resources to tackle
this
 in an effective manner.
Firstly
, the citizens try to find out how to explore their available products and services that can be exported internationally.
For example
, there are some counties, which are located in Africa
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
show examples
 a huge collection of coal and gold mining industries.
However
, they still
encouter
Correct your spelling
encounter
 poverty, as a consequence of corruptions and ill-management of the system. If these issues can be eliminated, they could bring a drastic change in their economy and guide it in a positive direction.
Secondly
, after finding the actual issue, use available resources to handle the factor in a better way. One obvious strategy is that building a
curruption
Correct your spelling
corruption
 free committee to oversee the functioning of the country and the profit which they gain from the trade and business can invest in the development of the public structures. Even though it seems to be challenging in the beginning, slowly and gradually,
this
 method can be productive and the country can overcome its financial issues to a greater extent with the assistance and cooperation of
own
Correct pronoun usage
its own
show examples
 people. In conclusion, there are some people who think that
instead
 of expecting financial supports from the rich, the underprivileged nations can find an ultimate solution for
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 troubles by own. I completely agree with
this
 since eliminating the causative factor from its root and
palnning
Correct your spelling
planning
 and implementing a well-structured action plan would make the country prosper again.
Submitted by Sal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • limited resources
  • moral obligation
  • global stability
  • economic impact
  • domestic issues
  • international aid
  • diplomatic relationships
  • resource allocation
  • healthcare
  • education
  • infrastructure
  • national priorities
  • desperate need
  • indirect benefit
  • goodwill
What to do next:
Look at other essays: