People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons for example, new experience, career preparation, increased knowledge etc. why do you think people attend colleges or universities?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

show examples
young people learn and experience in their universities due to different reasons.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

most of these students want to upgrade themselves, personally I believe that there are other problems that lead young society to follow an educational path without any interest. On the one hand, individuals follow their interests to become professional on that. It means that, if a person wants to be successful in his job, he or she must have a great deal with its academic path.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if we improve our knowledge and learn it academically, we will have fewer mistakes, which boost our chance of success.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, most of the time learning a specific subject is a productive way to have a high-salary profession. It is obvious, whenever employers want to employ and develop their employees, they looking for a person who has a great degree in that career. As result, a wide range of professional opportunities are offered to them and they choose their loyal job more easily than the others based on their needs.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some of the students are sent to colleges or universities with some negative aspects. In today's world, many teenagers are under the parent's pressure for having a high educational degree without any attention to their children's interests.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some of the skilled young people have been sent to education places who have great talent in some other subjects which need any classrooms ,
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as athletes. In general, many
society
Change to a plural noun
societies

The singular countable noun society follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

show examples
is sent to these places to follow and improve their personal skills. But some of them study their subjects without any interest.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: