Some people think it is more important for government to spend public money on promoting a healthy lifestyle in order to prevent illness than to spend it on the treatment of people who are already ill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, it is common to see governments giving a great deal of
money
to ill patients. A lot of
people
have proposed that
instead
of investing in the cure of these patients, the
government
should support a healthy lifestyle.
This
essay will show why I agree with
this
view. Stopping the
money
investment in treatments of
people
who are already ill might trigger a health crisis. A big portion of the population is struggling with diseases in hospitals and if the
government
suddenly decides to stop funding them, they might end up dying.
Also
, some
people
are born already ill, their treatments are extremely expensive and the
government
does not have another choice but to be accountable for their life.
For instance
, the US
government
is completely supportive of
this
matter. A big part of the
money
collected from taxes in America goes to the treatment of patients with cancer.
Lastly
, promoting a healthy lifestyle is not always effective. Some
people
just decide to ignore it and after all, they keep eating unhealthy food and having bad habits. To some extent, investing in
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
style of communities might prevent many diseases. Starting with the future generations, they will be aware of what could cause diseases or how could they be less likely to get one.
For instance
, if the
government
introduces healthy food campaigns in schools, kids will be aware of the benefits of eating healthy and
therefore
, there might be less obesity among
people
in the future.
Also
, if
people
have more opportunities available to them, like free sports centres or free nutritions plans, they would be encouraged to be healthy.
Also
, investments in more ads on tv about the risk of eating junk food or smoking ,
for instance
, could create a sense of responsibility in
people
' mind, which might result in the drop of some illness among communities. In conclusion, the
government
should not stop funding hospitals and ill
people
. I think that there could be a balance between the amount of
money
they spend on it and the
money
they could spend on a healthy lifestyle. To me, as long as ill
people
are not left behind without another choice but to die, healthy lifestyles could still be promoted.
Submitted by juansebastian-t on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • healthy lifestyle
  • prevent
  • illness
  • treatment
  • public money
  • government expenditure
  • reduce
  • burden
  • healthcare system
  • preventive measures
  • improve
  • well-being
  • invest
  • long-term benefits
  • society
  • necessary care
  • balance
  • address
  • effectively
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