IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Since Most information about culture and history can be found online, museums are no longer needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#information #culture #history #museums
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Few citizens
argues
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argue
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 that with help of
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
 individuals can get any detail about history and traditions nowadays.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
museums
Use synonyms
 are not necessary these days.
However
Linking Words
, the internet images can not take place of practical view. For that reason,
i
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I
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 completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 notion.
Museum
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The museum
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 plays an essential role to represent the old era. There are several
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
why it is important. The
first
Linking Words
 and major reason is, people can get practically view of ancient things. With the help of images people only can get theoretical knowledge and
imaginary
Correct article usage
an imaginary
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 view of any object whereas in
museum
Add an article
the museum
a museum
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 they can know about objects on
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
 basis. Another point to
be consider
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consider
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 that, it is a tourist attraction. Museum has too much attraction of tourism. Due to it, it is
a
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apply
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beneficial for
country’s
Correct article usage
the country’s
show examples
 economy. These days foreign tourists mostly prefer to know about the nation’s ancient things.
Hence
Linking Words
, they travel
Use synonyms
museums
Change preposition
to museums
show examples
 on
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
 basis and with the taxes from visitors fees the government can earn money.
For instance
Linking Words
, India
know
Change the verb form
knows
show examples
 for that tradition and old era. There
are
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is
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number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of popular national leaders they had. They conducted a survey
last
Linking Words
 year about travellers who visit that country. In
that
Add a comma
,that
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 they showed 75% of international tourists visited
museums
Use synonyms
 in different cities and tried to know about their culture. To conclude, in
this
Linking Words
 modern era, people have
busy
Add an article
a busy
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 schedule they do not have time to visit
museums
Use synonyms
 but to know about their old culture is a duty for everyone
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
museums
Use synonyms
 are needed.
Submitted by shubhampatel19021 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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