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Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island, according to a survey of visitors. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie charts give information about the most common advantages and disadvantages of Bowen
Island
Use synonyms
,
according to
Linking Words
 a tourist poll
According to
Linking Words
tourist
Correct article usage
a tourist
show examples
 poll, Bowen
Island
Use synonyms
 has attracted
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the 2 most special
things
Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the scenery and the
people
Use synonyms
 with 35 and 42
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 respectively. The proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 who feel satisfied with their accommodation is about 11
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and
this
Linking Words
as
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 an advantage. It has 12
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 think that
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
show examples
 of the
island
Use synonyms
 is an essential attraction.
However
Linking Words
, there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
things
Use synonyms
 that affect tourist satisfaction, especially is
high
Add an article
the high
show examples
 cost of living
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 50
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Besides
Linking Words
, the authorities were not taken responsibility for the entertainment,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 must be a huge omission. 10 and 15
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 is the worst number for
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
remain
Wrong verb form
remaining
show examples
things
Use synonyms
: weather and food quality. So that
this
Linking Words
island
Use synonyms
 must have changed a lot in the future. In conclusion, I believe that most
people
Use synonyms
 like Bowen
Island
Use synonyms
 because of the
people
Use synonyms
 and the scenery.
However
Linking Words
, there should be some
things
Use synonyms
 that need to be changed
such
Linking Words
 as the cost of living
is
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 too high or the quality of the food
is
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 so bad.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to, however".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words island, things, people, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • According to the survey
  • Visitors reported
  • The pie charts show
  • The most common advantages/disadvantages
  • A significant proportion
  • A small percentage
  • In contrast
  • Notably
  • The largest segment
  • Similarly
  • On the other hand
  • A major advantage/disadvantage
  • To highlight
  • Overall effect
  • Impact the experience
  • In summary
  • Illustrates
  • Reflects
  • Highlights
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