Many children these days face difficulties to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the causes of this situation? What could be the possible solutions?

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It has been pointed out that it is quite tough for a vast majority of young students to focus on their

school

Use synonyms

studying

Replace the word

studies

show examples

nowadays. Personally, I am of the opinion that

this

Linking Words

appalling situation is a result of the increasing number of temptations, and several methods would be

done

Verb problem

used

show examples

to deal with

this

Linking Words

issue. First of all, with the development of technology and the thriving of entertainment facilities in each city, pupils are able to take part in more attractive and intriguing activities after

school

Use synonyms

hours. As these activities are stimulating, young people may immerse themselves in a fascinating environment for a long period, which impairs their concentration towards their

studying

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, there are countless intriguing

Use synonyms

shows popping up in front of

school

Use synonyms

learners. If they spend a great deal of free time watching

Use synonyms

, they will encounter several

hurtles

Correct your spelling

hurdles

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to absorb themselves from the program.

As a result

Linking Words

, when they sit in the classroom, they are still thinking about plots or characters of

Use synonyms

programs,

thus

Linking Words

young students are less likely to focus on what they are taught in classes.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, parents should make

effort

Correct article usage

an effort

show examples

to help their children tackle

this

Linking Words

matter. As an illustration, parents are able to control the time when their sons and daughters are allowed to watch

Use synonyms

or browse the internet.

Besides

Linking Words

, young children should learn how to restrict their surrounding temptations

such

Linking Words

as intriguing shows and their friends’ invitations to hang out. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

people may vary in their opinions about the reason why

concentrations

Fix the agreement mistake

concentration

show examples

school

Use synonyms

learning

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

getting lower and the means of

deal

Wrong verb form

dealing

show examples

with

this

Linking Words

issue, I consider that the prosperous modern temptations are the main reason, and parents and children should cooperate to treat

this

Linking Words

matter.

strawberry.guanWed Jun 23 2021

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coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and flows logically into the next. One way to do this is by using linking words and phrases more effectively.

task achievement

While the essay provides a complete response to the prompt, further elaboration on the solutions and causes could improve the depth of the response. Additionally, including more diverse examples would add to the comprehensiveness.

logical structure

The essay is clearly structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This aids in maintaining a logical flow of ideas.

relevant specific examples

The essay offers relevant examples, such as the impact of technology and entertainment on children's concentration, which strengthens the argument.

complete response

The writer addresses both causes and solutions, which demonstrates a complete response to the task prompt.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

technological distractions
overloaded curriculum
nutritional deficiencies
sleep deprivation
learning disorders
stress and anxiety
implementation
reform
promote
policy
adequate
specialized support
resources
mindfulness
meditation
time management
screen time
cognitive function
attention span
memory retention
consistent sleep schedule
extracurricular activities
academic expectations

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Many children these days face difficulties to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the causes of this situation? What could be the possible solutions?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

some experts believe for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school.Do the advantages of learning a foreign language at an early age outweigh the disadvantages?

Many young people leave their own countries to work abroad. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of working abroad and give your own opinion

Your photograph recently won a photography competition and will be shown in an exhibition. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter •describe the photograph you sent to the competition •tell him/her about the exhibition where your photo will be shown •invite him/her to the exhibition

The number of students studying science at university is constantly declining. What do you think are the causes? What effects will this have on our society?