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Band 3.5

Many parents today employ private tutors to teach their children school hours. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#parents #tutors #children #school #hours #development
Many
children
 are struggling at school.
Therefore
, parents employ private tutors to help their
children
 get their grades up. In my perspective, I deem it beneficial and believe it can generate positive outcomes
such
 as profound experience and deep education.
However
, there can be some detrimental outcomes as well, which
this
 essay will highlight.
Firstly
, face-to-face learning may increase the attention given to a
child
.
This
 may improve the competence of a
child
 to learn.
However
,
children
 should by themselves be competent enough to learn certain skills,
such
 as biology, science and physics. A tutor should,
therefore
, not be a requirement.
Hence
, those individuals who have mastered the ability to learn, are
subsequently
 more likely to be promoted in
later
Add an article
the later
a later
show examples
 stage of life.
By contrast
, It may be striking to a young
child
 to be educated alone. Schools
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 one of the most important places where
children
 can interact with each other. Having private teachers may increase the knowledge of a
child
, but can
also
 impair social skills.
Submitted by tuurwagemans on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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