"in some cultures children were told that they can achieve anything if they try hard what are the advantges and disadvantges " my essay

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In some cultures,

children

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are often told that they can achieve anything if they

work

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hard.

While

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this

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message can inspire determination and confidence, it can

also

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create unrealistic expectations and pressure.

This

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essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of giving

children

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this

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message. On the one hand, encouraging

children

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to believe in their potential can have many positive effects. Motivational words and consistent support from parents and teachers can help young people develop resilience and a strong

work

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ethic.

For example

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, when parents encourage their child from an early age,

such

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as supporting them

while

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learning to walk, the child is more likely to gain confidence and improve faster.

Similarly

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, if teachers focus on nurturing students' creativity, it is likely that hidden talents will emerge, and students may achieve outstanding success both academically and personally.

On the other hand

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, there are disadvantages to telling

children

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that hard

work

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guarantees success. One important issue is that every child has different abilities and learning speeds. Some may excel at tasks

such

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as mathematics,

while

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others struggle, even if they try their best. When

children

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believe that effort alone will lead to success but fail to see results, they may feel frustrated and disappointed, which can negatively affect their self-esteem and motivation. In conclusion,

while

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encouraging

children

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work

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hard can inspire them to develop strong skills and confidence, it is

also

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important to recognize individual differences and avoid placing unrealistic expectations on them. In my opinion, the advantages of teaching

children

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the value of hard

work

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outweigh the disadvantages, as long as adults provide emotional support and realistic guidance.

alyah.alshehriWed Apr 16 2025

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task achievement

Consider adding more specific examples or data to support your main points. This can enhance the clarity and impact of your arguments.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea. This can improve the logical flow of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Try to vary your sentence structures to enhance the overall sophistication of your writing. This will keep the reader engaged.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction clearly outlines the essay's purpose and sets the stage for the discussion, which is effective and engaging.

task achievement

You have successfully identified both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic, demonstrating a balanced understanding of the issue.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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"in some cultures children were told that they can achieve anything if they try hard what are the advantges and disadvantges " my essay

Your opinion

The spread of urban areas has led to deforestation and has caused many animal species to become endangered. Environmental groups are urging governments to protect these animals. What are the benefits of protecting animals? What can governments do to protect animals?

some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.discuss both these views and give your own opinion.