some people think governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and hosing problems to help people to prevent illness and disease . to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #governments #focus #pollution #illness #disease

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A fair amount of folks believe that the authorities should concentrate on lowering environmental

pollution

Use synonyms

and residential troubles to aid

people

Use synonyms

to avert sickness and flu. In my opinion, the authorities of the nation should support in order to help the society from danger.

To begin

Linking Words

with,

pollution

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is the common term that our ears are attuned to it.

Pollution

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is the prominent reason behind

people

Use synonyms

's sickness.

In other words

Linking Words

, in the modern era,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mankind is enjoying

the

Correct article usage

show examples

luxurious comfortable life due to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technological developments which

Change the verb form

are

show examples

triggering

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

pollution

Use synonyms

levels to

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

peak.

For example

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, the carbon monoxide gas emitted from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

cars is the highest

pollution

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ratio across the world. Due to

this

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harmful gas, the entire community is affected

with

Change preposition

show examples

health issues.

Thus

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, the authorities should strictly impose a rule to ban the luxurious cars which

Change the verb form

are

show examples

rising the

pollution

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levels in the world.

Furthermore

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, there are certain

people

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in the world who are suffering from diseases due to poverty. There

Change the verb form

are

show examples

no sophisticated hospitals and emergency wards in rural areas. To illustrate

this

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, an article in Hindu magazine published that 40 per cent of the

people

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are dying due to lack of treatment in the countryside.

Therefore

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, the government should increase the facilities

such

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equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

, machines and more beds to accommodate the patients suffering from health problems. To conclude, the government should imply

pollution

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-free laws and obligations in order to alleviate the environmental problems and expand the facilities provided in the countryside to help the

people

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facing difficulties in health.

Submitted by amuthabecse on Sat Jun 26 2021

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

respiratory diseases
heart conditions
incidence
affordable housing
stress
infectious diseases
preventative measures
cost-effective
healthcare infrastructure
comprehensive approach
global warming
climate change
exacerbated

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