IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people argue that the technology such as mobile phone destroys social interaction. Do you agree or disagree.

#people #technology #phone #interaction
It is considered that several advancements like cell phones and computers are ruining the social life among
people
. I completely agree with the above statement as electronic gadgets
plays
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play
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 a major part in ending the fellowship.
This
 essay will substantiate my disagreements in the following paragraphs with relevant examples.
Firstly
, social relationships are necessary for every individual in the world.
However
,
now-a-days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
people
 are not being expressive in
a
Remove the article
apply
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physical contact.
Although
 they are in touch with their loved ones over
phone
Correct article usage
the phone
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, still they do not understand them due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of physical bonding and face to face conversation.
Moreover
, individuals are occupying themselves with the electronic item which makes them less expressive and feels like not participating in social life.
This
 is the primary reason
of
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for
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 gadgets that are mostly utilised by
the
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apply
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youngsters now.
For example
, despite
of
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apply
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attending social gatherings,
people
 still spend their time using mobile phones
instead
 of communicating with their groups.
Secondly
, children are utilizing their most of the time in playing video games which distracts them to concentrate on
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
show examples
.
Therefore
, they cannot able to communicate properly with others and learn moral values at their age which result in their misbehaviour and arrogance.
Moreover
, kids cannot able to educate themselves with certain ethics which will be useful in
their
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the
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 long run.
For instance
, children
gets
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get
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 frustrated being in public because their addiction makes them comfortable being in isolation.
This
 impacts their social relationships which are very crucial to develop themselves in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. To conclude, without any doubt facilities provided by technology are outstanding,
however
, the physical bonding and one-to-one conversations are destroyed today but if we can understand them and try to gel with
people
then
 the destruction can be controlled.
Submitted by shivanisampurna on

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