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Writing Samples
Band 6

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impact #populations
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Nowadays, the average
life
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 expectancy is increasing because of the development of technology in the health system and the improvement of
life
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’s quality.
However
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,
this
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 trend has brought numerous
problems
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 to the countries in the world. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss the
problems
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 and the measures to decrease the influence of ageing populations. Longer average
life
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 expectancy has caused a variety of
problems
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 for all countries.
Firstly
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, when
people
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 live longer, there will be a lack of accommodation for all the population.
That is
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 because when old
people
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 die, their houses will be sold
cho
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to
 other younger
people
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.
As a result
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, if they still live for a long time so that the amount of accommodation for young
people
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 to buy and live will be reduced and there will not be enough places for everyone to live.
Secondly
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, when the number of old
people
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 is large, the government has to spend the national budget more for social welfare for them in order to support their health and
life
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.
Consequently
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, the country will not have money to invest in other fields
such
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 as the
economyas
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economy as
economy
economy's
economy
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 and the
economy
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 will decline. To tackle these
problems
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, I think there are two measures that can be applied.
First
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 of all, the government can raise the birth proportion of young
people
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 by encouraging families to have (more) children young
people
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 to give birth.
Consequently
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, the number of young
people
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in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 working age will be increased and human resources for the labour market will be higher, which results in the development of the
economy
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. The
second
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 measure is to recruit more labour and human resources from foreign countries so that we will have more
people
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 work for the country and our
economy
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 will be developed. In conclusion, there are numerous
problems
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 that originate from the average
life
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 expectancy
such
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 as the lack of accommodation and the decrease in the
economy
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 and the government should use plenty of solutions to solve these
problems
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.
Submitted by nguyenletrung90 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
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