Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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Many countries require young men to complete compulsory military

service

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, and some suggest

this

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should be a global practice for both men and women.

While

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this

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system offers certain benefits, I believe it should remain optional, as mandatory

service

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can have significant drawbacks. One major advantage of compulsory military

service

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is that it

instills

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instils

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discipline, teamwork, and physical fitness. Young individuals develop valuable life skills,

such

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as leadership and resilience, which can benefit their future careers and personal growth.

Moreover

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, a larger military force strengthens national

defense

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defence

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, deterring potential threats. Countries with well-trained armies often enjoy greater security and global influence.

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, military training can foster a sense of national unity and responsibility among citizens, strengthening social cohesion.

However

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, enforcing military

service

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may not be suitable for everyone. Some individuals have career aspirations, personal commitments, or health conditions that make military life difficult or impractical. Forcing unwilling participants into

service

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could negatively affect morale and

overall

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efficiency.

Additionally

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, compulsory military

service

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restricts personal freedom, which is a fundamental value in democratic societies. From an economic perspective, maintaining a large standing army is expensive, diverting essential funds from education, healthcare, and infrastructure- areas that contribute significantly to national development. A balanced approach is ideal.

Instead

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of making

service

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mandatory, governments could encourage voluntary enlistment by offering incentives

such

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as education subsidies, career training, or financial benefits.

This

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would attract motivated individuals

while

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respecting personal choice. In conclusion,

while

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compulsory military

service

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has advantages, it should not be a global requirement. Encouraging voluntary participation ensures national security

while

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preserving individual freedom and economic stability.

cathycheungxxx

Apr 23, 2026

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task response

Add one real example to make your ideas stronger.

task response

Explain a little more why free choice is important.

task response

Your ideas are clear, but some points could be more fully developed.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words with care and keep the flow smooth.

coherence and cohesion

Each main paragraph has one clear focus, which is good, but you can add one more sentence of support.

coherence and cohesion

The essay moves in a clear order from start to end.

task response

You answer the question clearly and keep the same opinion all through the essay.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are both clear and effective.

coherence and cohesion

Each paragraph has a clear main idea.

coherence and cohesion

You use good topic sentences to guide the reader.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Compulsory
Military service
Conscription
Patriotism
National security
Social equality
Discipline
Physical fitness
Life skills
Job training
Infringement
Conscripts
Gender equality
Mandatory
Economy
Education system
Labor market
Civil service
Alternative forms
Balanced view

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