IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many countries, school-age children spend their free time doing homework. Is it a good or a bad thing? Give examples based on your own experience.

#countries #children #time #homework
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is a common trend in a number of countries that school
students
Use synonyms
 prefer doing their school
homework
Use synonyms
 even during their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 which is not a good thing as it would be affecting their health if they do not participate in other activities
such
Linking Words
 as sports or entertainment.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, it is prevalent in many countries that children studying in schools spend a lot of their
time
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
completing
homework
Use synonyms
. The reason is that they are over-burned to complete extra work on every subject
such
Linking Words
 as Science, Mathematics, and others. In order to meet the deadlines, they are left with no option but to do their
homework
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, competition is another major reason. To beat the growing competition, children are made to devote a maximum number of hours towards studies to achieve great results.
For example
Linking Words
, getting
even
Correct article usage
an even
show examples
90
Correct article usage
a 90
show examples
% score is not sufficient since there is a large crowd of
students
Use synonyms
 who are already gaining 98% marks. To beat that 8% margin, they spend hours overnight committing more
time
Use synonyms
.
Further
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 increasing trend among the kids studying in schools is pathetic as it is compromising on their health.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 do not skip to perform any physical activity
such
Linking Words
 as playing cricket, basketball and other sports.
Thus
Linking Words
, they would not be able to give sufficient
time
Use synonyms
 towards their health and fitness.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, entertainment and fun related activities
such
Linking Words
 as playing a musical instrument, dancing and others would be limited, so their school life would end up in boredom. Overall, it can be said that it is not appropriate for the
students
Use synonyms
 to spend most of the
time
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
doing
homework
Use synonyms
. They should rather be allowed to give balanced
time
Use synonyms
 for performing all types of activities.
Submitted by krv.vaibhav on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: