Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society.

#people #aim #university #education #graduates #jobs #individuals #society

Nowadays, more and more

people

are making the choice to go to

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

college. While

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it is occasionally argued that the target of higher education is only to support graduated students to get

Remove the article

apply

show examples

better employment.

However

, in my opinion, there are much wider good impacts not just for

Add an article

the resident

show examples

resident

Fix the agreement mistake

residents

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but

also

for

society

. It is certainly true that one of the main purposes of

university

college is to secure a better

job

. The majority of

people

regularly want to improve their future career prospects and attending

university

is one of the best ways. It’s beneficial for them to be

responsibled

Correct your spelling

responsible

in a high position. In today's degree-based

society

, individuals with certifications are more likely

get

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to get

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a well-paid

job

than residents without degrees. A study showed that recruiters tend to

favor

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favour

show examples

candidates who studied in universities over those who did not.

Hence

, if a

university

is able to increase

job

Correct article usage

the job

show examples

prospects of its graduates,

people

are naturally inclined to believe that

this

is the only task a

university

is supposed to fulfil.

However

, there are other benefits for both citizens and

society

Firstly

, being independent while living away from parents is beneficial for students to develop better social skills and be more likely mature. A case in point is that there are a number of students

will

Correct pronoun usage

who will

show examples

have to leave their homes, live in dormitories, and socialize with new besties.

Therefore

, their maturity and confidence will increase, supporting them to be likely to have

fulfilling

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a fulfilling

show examples

life.

Secondly

society

will benefit from graduates who desire to develop

society

from all sides. We currently live in a very competitive world, so nations need educated

people

to be able to compete and prosper. To conclude, I believe that

although

Change the article

the

show examples

main goal of

university

education is to get the best

job

, there are clearly

further

benefits. If we continue to promote and encourage

university

attendance, it will lead to a better future for residents and

society

Submitted by Eteacher on Wed Jul 07 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

323 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society.

Politicians or more responsible for the protection of the environment than individual stock to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people work for the same company or organisation during their whole working life,while other say that it is better to work for different companies and organisations. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The world has been an enormous increase in flights for leisure, business and commercial purposes around the world over the recent years. Why do you think are the main advantages and disadvantages of such flights? Do you think flights should be taxed more?

Some people believe that schools should focus on academic subjects only, while others think that schools should also provide classes on life skills, such as communication and teamwork. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.