IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You use the local swimming pool often, and during one of your visits, you have encountered a problem. Write a letter to the manager. In your letter describe what the problem was tell what the swimming pool staff have done about it suggest your own solution to the problem.

#pool #visits #manager #staff
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Dear Mr. Wilson, I am one of the town residents who uses the “Splash”
pool
 frequently,
however
, a recent incident I experienced at your
pool
 made me reconsider my choice of the
pool
. The incident happened
last
 Friday when I was at the
pool
 with my family at around 5 pm. A small kid got out of the
pool
 for children and ran into the one for adults, which was clearly not suitable for him as the depth was around 2 meters. When the kid was struggling to get out of the
pool
, no staff member tried to help him. If I
did
Verb problem
had
show examples
 not
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 and
grab
Wrong verb form
grabbed
show examples
 him out of the
pool
 in time, the results could have been tragic. In consideration of
this
 incident, I suggest you hold regular training for the
pool
 staff about their responsibilities against
pool
 goers,
in particular
 small kids, so they are more cautious. Please take
this
 matter seriously and announce the action taken in
this
 regard to locals. Best regards, Farman Nazarov
Submitted by laman.nazarovaa on

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea for improved clarity and structure.
task achievement
While the letter covers the issues effectively, providing more specific details about proposed solutions could strengthen the task response.
coherence and cohesion
The letter has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion that logically guide the reader through your experience and suggestions.
task achievement
You addressed the issue clearly and offered a practical solution, reflecting a strong response to the task.
task achievement
The formal tone of the letter is appropriate for communicating with a manager, demonstrating awareness of suitable writing tone.
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