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Writing Samples
Band 6

some people say that the best way to improve publich health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #publich #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures
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One of the highly controversial issues today relates to whether there should be more options
of
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for
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 practising
sports
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 for the community or there should be other measures to increase the quality of public
health
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. In
this
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 essay, I am going to examine
this
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 question from both points of view and
then
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 give my own opinion on the matter. On one side of the
,
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apply
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the
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argument there are
people
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 who argue that the benefits of several alternatives to practice
sports
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 considerably outweigh its disadvantages. The main reason for believing
this
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 is that
people
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 tend to take advantage of a gym or a park nearby the office or nearby home. It is
also
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 possible to say that there is an inertial effect when friends have
this
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 habit of going to the gym during lunch and it possible to join them. One good illustration of
this
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 is when I worked in an office where there was an Olympic pool in the same building, it was quite convenient to go there after my working hours.
On the other hand
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, it is
also
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 possible to state the
sports
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 centre availability is not the only solution for public
health
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: to spread the awareness of practising sport is a complementary solution. Indeed, it is often argued that in ,fact
people
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 must be conscious of their responsibility as well.
In addition
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, public advertisings alerting to practice
sports
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 would significantly help
this
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 scenario. To illustrate the media power about
health
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, in Brazil, the government spread the non-smoking campaign that reduced from 40% to 9% of smoking
people
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 in 15 years. In conclusion, I believe that both arguments have their merits. On balance,
however
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, I tend to feel that other measures are absolutely necessary to overcome the challenge of increasing the quality of public
health
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. It is recommended to sum at least availability of
sports
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 facilities and to make
people
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 aware of the importance of the physical activities.
Submitted by lltiago on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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