IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people feel that the design of newly constructed buildings in big cities should be controlled by governments. Others believe those who finance the construction of a building should be free to design it as they see fit.

#people #design #buildings #cities #governments #finance #construction
As a matter of fact,in
this
 day and age, there are some actual issues. One of them is who observes to construct jobs, government or by those who carry out the design of the building. It seems to me that there are both
avantages
Correct your spelling
advantages
 and disadvantages on
this
 matter.
Firstly
,let us take a look at the advantages. More
people
 accept that the role of the
country
 is crucial in each job. One of them watches realizing the rule of the obligation. Many
people
 claim that if the
country
 doesn't realize control more actions will create or rise. As far as I understand,probably the government doesn't control and the companies will start to create what they desire. Maybe
this
 sounds excellent,
nevertheless
 afterwards some actions might establish as an example the company utilizes wrong materials,maybe to establish burnings. Recently,
this
 situation occurred in Azerbaijan.
On the other hand
,I believe that if they watch out, the design will be constructed better than the others.
Moreover
, being illustrated the pictures of ancient customs,garments and so on. On the one hand, some
people
 believe that the design is to
Add a missing verb
be realized
show examples
realized
Change the form of the verb
realize
show examples
 by who will enforce the finance duty. My own view on
this
 matter,
this
 is an affirmative idea a draft must make up by who engage to do the finance duty. Maybe they make new innovations.figures and so on. Weighing up both sides of the arguments, the
country
 had better observe and
this
 is a good point for
health
Add an article
the health
show examples
 of both the
country
 and
people
Submitted by aydin.quliyev2001 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: