Childhood obesity is becoming a problem throughout the developed world. Because of this, some people think that adverts for fast food, sweets and sugary snacks should not be allowed in schools and colleges. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? Give reasons for answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience.

#childhood #obesity #world #people #adverts #food #sweets #snacks #schools #colleges

In the developed countries, obesity in youngsters has increased at an alarming rate. Some people believe that advertisements for fast meals should be banned in academic institutions. I partially agree with

this

statement because a ban on adverts in educational places will not eradicate the eating habits of fast cuisine.

To begin

with, fast-food companies manipulate the minds of the young generation with advertisements. They use celebrities for their ads, when young minds watch the famous person eating the sweets or drinking the sugary products they attract towards it. By consuming these brands they become used to it and make it a habit.

For example

, famous footballer Cristino Ronaldo refused to drink the coca-cola during an interview and the company suffered a billion dollars loss by his act. If these adverts are banned from academic institutions, adolescents will not be attracted to sugary products.

On the other hand

, banning the promotion is not the ultimate act to stop newly developed minds from using it. They can watch the same ads on TV or the internet in their homes yet they can be attracted to junk foodstuff.

For instance

, I was surprised when my 2 years old son noticed Pepsi in an ad on TV and he asked his mother to give him the same product from the fridge.

Furthermore

, an awareness program should be launched about the drawbacks of canned production rather than just banning the adverts in academic places. Adolescents should be taught about the fatness issues which the young generation is suffering nowadays. To conclude,

such

promotional activities should be banned completely from the vicinity of academic institutions as well as an awareness program should be launched to teach the side effects of unhealthy meals.

Submitted by azhar.javaid6 on Mon Jul 19 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
In a number of countries ,some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railways lines for very fast friends between cities .others believe the money should be spend on improving existing public transport.
In this contemporary era, due to the growth of urban areas, the number of extinct species is rapidly growing. Thus, it is necessary that relevant measures are taken to protect these animal. The following essay will discuss the advantages of this protection as well as governments duty regarding this problem.
7.5
band
With the widespread use of interent , more and more peolpe choose to work from home. Do the advantage of this trend outwight the disadvantage?
An increasing number of individuals today opt to work from home due to the availability of high-speed internet instead of working in an office. Nowadays, everyone has to increase their productivity to beat this competitive world without losing precious time. This choice has a number of benefits and drawbacks, which will be discussed in this essay.
5.5
band
Overpopulation in many major urban centres around the world is a major problem. What are the cause of this? How can this problem be solved?
In an up-coming world the overcrowded cities appear as the main issue to nations. This essay will examine the main causes of this tendency and possible solutions to this problem.
6.5
band
Some celebrities say their love lives shouldn’t be under scrutiny in the media. However, other people feel that they should accept this as part of their fame. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion?
While certain famous individuals argue for their personal lives to stay undiscussed in the news forums, others believe that the acceptance of this discussion is the path forward. This essay will discuss both views and explain why I completely agree with the former opinion.
6
band
Many people nowadays are concerned about the level of air pollution created by the number of people using air travel. They suggest it may be safer for people to use alternative forms of transportation such as road transport. To extend do you agree that travel by road may be safer option?
There are those who say that travel by air produced air pollution and they suggest that ground transport must be a safer option. I mostly agree that travel by road is a better choice to reduce air pollution, I realize that there are other aspects to consider. This essay will examine the reason for my opinions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

In a number of countries ,some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railways lines for very fast friends between cities .others believe the money should be spend on improving existing public transport.

With the widespread use of interent , more and more peolpe choose to work from home. Do the advantage of this trend outwight the disadvantage?

Overpopulation in many major urban centres around the world is a major problem. What are the cause of this? How can this problem be solved?

Some celebrities say their love lives shouldn’t be under scrutiny in the media. However, other people feel that they should accept this as part of their fame. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion?

Many people nowadays are concerned about the level of air pollution created by the number of people using air travel. They suggest it may be safer for people to use alternative forms of transportation such as road transport. To extend do you agree that travel by road may be safer option?