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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #belive #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
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Currently, we live in a world in which
people
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 get used to living with their bad salaries, with
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
 jobs that make them unhappy, and in general, with their sad and
depressed
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depressing
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 lives. But there are some
people
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, who decide to leave the common coast and seek their happiness before anything. Now, I will show my point of view about these two possible situations. It is said that young
people
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 are the future of society and that we should fight for it; but many young adults, at the end of their 4 or 5-year university degree, must look for work and find a reality which is that they
don´t
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 have any experience and the possible job they acquire will not be what they are looking for, so they won´t be happy and they will not receive a salary commensurate with their effort. Another clear example is the woman who wants to rise to a position in her company but she cannot because of the machismo that exists in her work or because she doesn´t have the necessary studies,
likewise
Linking Words
, there are
people
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 who
don´t
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 have the resources to access to
a
Remove the article
apply
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higher education and they get nothing but minimum wage jobs. There are many
people
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 who say that
people
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 who get used to living with
that
Correct pronoun usage
what
show examples
 they have is because they
don´t
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 want to get ahead, but it is not true, there are
people
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 who
don´t
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 have options. Just as recent college graduates have to gain experience to start earning good wages, the woman who is unhappy with her job may not be able to leave it because she has a family to support, and the
people
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 who are in a cleaning job,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do it to one day pay for a university.
That is
Linking Words
 why I think that the world we are in doesn´t allow us to do much more than we would like, and
although
Linking Words
people
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don´t
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 feel identified with their work, they do it so that in the future they do not depend on it and move forward as they would like, all human beings carry their progress in the world and to get out of the common coast, one must
first
Linking Words
 be involved in it.
Submitted by rocio.nm890 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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