IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#universities #numbers #students
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In my opinion,
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
 and women should have access to the same educational opportunities.It is wrong to discriminate against students because of their
gender
Use synonyms
. But
however
Linking Words
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 do not think that
univercities
Correct your spelling
universities
 should accept
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 equal number of
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
show examples
 and women. I think
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society should focus on
give
Change the form of the verb
giving
show examples
 the same educational
resoures
Correct your spelling
resources
 to
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
, improve
gender
Use synonyms
 equality, make each
gendar
Correct your spelling
gender
gear
 have equal opportunities. But in my eyes, having the same number of men and women in college can not make those things
heppen
Correct your spelling
happen
.
In
Change the preposition
On
show examples
 the contrary,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think it may undermine fairness. In my own opinion, universities should choose
student
Add an article
a student
the student
show examples
 who is more brilliant,
Gender
Use synonyms
 should not be an assessment of
wether
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 or not to be admitted. The
sociaty
Correct your spelling
society
 should make sure they
povide
Correct your spelling
provide
 the same opportunity to everyone.
Than
Replace the word
Then
show examples
 again, different major may fit different
gender
Use synonyms
, some major would have no enough male or female applicants or attract on one kind
gender
Use synonyms
 applicants
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 the other, Some major
require
Change the verb form
requires
show examples
 great patience and other might require physical strength. If it
obligate
Add a missing verb
is obligate
show examples
 there must have identical
gender
Use synonyms
, it will confuse the society system. Universities should select the best candidates for each course according to their
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
show examples
,people should
matriculatiom
Correct your spelling
matriculation
matriculate
 because of their standout power
instead
Linking Words
 of they are man or woman. Different
gender
Use synonyms
 should complement each other's strengths. In conclusion, the slecetiotion of
studient
Correct your spelling
student
 should
based
Change the verb form
base
be based
show examples
 on their faculty and will,
gender
Use synonyms
 should not be
aconsideration
Correct your spelling
a consideration
consideration
 to influence the
adimission
Correct your spelling
admission
 criteria, in my eyes,
this
Linking Words
 is an unfair thing.
Submitted by raywoocn on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
Look at other essays: