Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people argue that talking with criminals who have turned their
lives
around after serving a prison is good for
teenagers
to get an insight into the consequences of breaking laws. Personally, I entirely concur with
this
opinion
due to
the lack of efficiency of other alternatives and the general tendency of
teenagers
.
To begin
with, having a conversation with the ex-prisoners is fitted with the general youngsters' tendency . It is undeniable that most youngsters are extremely keen to hear the stories of those who had experiences, especially those who spent part of their
lives
serving in prison
due to
their law-breaking behaviours. Thanks to these opportunities, ex-prisoners could vividly present what they had undergone
as well as
the dark side of their lifestyle in the past, which completely reverses the glamorous
lives
that the younger thought it would be.
This
would help the young have a practical view of life and deter them from law-breaking activities.
Moreover
,
this
kind of knowledge is hard for
teenagers
to acquire if it remains
just
Rephrase
apply
show examples
theoretical, so talking to reformed offenders, in comparison with other alternatives, will make their ideas clarified and more effective.
Besides
, the alternatives which educate about crime would apply less effectively. In terms of parental guidance, many parents are likely to neglect to inform their children about laws. Meanwhile, the option for teachers or police officers to visually discuss punishments for lawbreakers is prone to be more acknowledged but the
teenagers
are often reluctant to take
this
advice. Eventually, influencers and celebrities might play an important role in legal education, but
this
method itself has no opportunity for young people to interact and ask questions, leading to insufficient knowledge and even reverse reactions. In conclusion, I definitely agree with the opinion that talking with ex-prisoners who turned their
lives
around later would be an appropriate approach to deter young people from committing crimes.
Submitted by ieltsamiedu on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Include an introductory statement that clearly states your position and a concluding paragraph that summarizes your argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
Develop each main point with clear supporting details, examples, and explanations to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task to provide a complete response with a clear position throughout your essay.
task achievement
Present ideas with clarity and depth to convey comprehensive arguments.
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Incorporate relevant and specific examples to substantiate your points and make your essay more convincing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prisoners
  • rehabilitation
  • recidivism
  • consequences
  • insights
  • deterrent
  • guidance
  • support
  • role models
  • positive change
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