Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

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There are many
people
Use synonyms
discuss
Correct pronoun usage
who discuss
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that extreme
sports
Use synonyms
should be prohibited due to the risks for
people
Use synonyms
's health. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
argument, performing or attending these
sports
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such
Linking Words
as skiing, bungee-jumping and parachuting are a choice of an individual and banning them is against the freedom of
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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even though these
sports
Use synonyms
Add a missing verb
are
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highly risky for human health.
To begin
Linking Words
with, there are many stories about
people
Use synonyms
who lost their lives while climbing the mountains, skiing or paragliding.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
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there are many
people
Use synonyms
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
show examples
to amputate the cause of these adventure
sports
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. It is understandable that the unfortunate consequences
forces
Change the verb form
force
show examples
people
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to
think
Add the particle
tothink
show examples
take some cautions as banning or limiting the attendance for these
activities
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.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
climbing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Everest is one of the most extreme
activities
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in the world and every year thousands of athlete's are climbing the most ruthless mountain
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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earth to experience the excitement of being
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
top of the world.
However
Linking Words
, it is
known
Correct article usage
a known
show examples
fact that many sportsmen were died or lost a limb while climbing due to the brutal conditions in the mouth even though some of them were very experienced in their branch.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that prohibiting
to attend
Change the verb form
attending
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adventure
sports
Use synonyms
not
Add a missing verb
does not
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prevent any
loses
Replace the word
losses
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and in
contract
Add an article
the contract
a contract
show examples
may cause more
loses
Replace the word
losses
show examples
due to
illegalisation
Correct your spelling
legalisation
. If authorities would ban
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
participate performing these
sports
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there could be
blackmarkets
Correct your spelling
black markets
black market
for
people
Use synonyms
who want to experience these.
On the other hand
Linking Words
to participate
these
Change preposition
in these
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
is a
choose
Replace the word
choice
show examples
of an
individuals
Fix the agreement mistake
individual
show examples
and any kind of prohibition would be a
violate
Replace the word
violation
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
the freedom of
people
Use synonyms
. In my opinion,
people
Use synonyms
can choose to do any
activities
Use synonyms
they want but understand the potential consequences clearly. That's why authorities should explain and share the risks transparently and inform
people
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for
Change preposition
of
show examples
past experiences. In conclusion, undoubtedly extreme
sports
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can cause
serious
Add an article
the serious
a serious
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result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
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to
people
Use synonyms
's
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
but it shouldn't forget that the decision of participation
is belongs
Change the verb form
is belonged
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
to people
show examples
.That's why in my opinion
people
Use synonyms
should argue how to make these
activities
Use synonyms
more secure before than thought of
banning
Correct pronoun usage
thembanning
show examples
.
Submitted by gorkemozzeytin on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adrenaline rush
  • risk threshold
  • thrill-seeking
  • safety protocols
  • hazard assessment
  • adventure tourism
  • regulatory framework
  • personal autonomy
  • informed consent
  • risk mitigation strategies
  • thrill-seeking behavior
  • protective gear
  • extreme athleticism
  • freedom of choice
  • accident prevalence
  • emergency response
  • courage and resilience
  • endorphin release
  • legal implications
  • peer pressure effects
What to do next:
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