Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Possessing additional capital and reduced free
time
Use synonyms
is exceeding reduced capital and to be at large.
The society
Correct article usage
Society
show examples
aspires to have more capital as it will facilitate in achieving dreams as well as supporting the communities. I will elucidate more about capital and
time
Use synonyms
and assert my opinion.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society aspires to have more
money
Use synonyms
as capital is associated with pleasure and achievements.
In addition
Linking Words
, the merits of having capital are that you are in a position of having
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
trends, big houses and cars without pressure.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
almost all the presidents globally
uses
Change the verb form
use
show examples
Mercedes or Armani which are status symbols.
Money
Use synonyms
compel
Change the verb form
compels
show examples
Add an article
a
show examples
quality of life to be preferable and
thus
Linking Words
reduce
povery
Correct your spelling
poverty
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, to add more salt to the wound every human being
wound
Correct your spelling
would
show examples
choose to have capital and rather have no
time
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, many people desire to be wealthy very fast as the notion says happiness is only found
Use synonyms
money
Change preposition
in money
show examples
. That being said, the society earning less and having free
time
Use synonyms
suite
Correct your spelling
suit
show examples
them. They satisfy what they have and I am certain that they convince others that
money
Use synonyms
can’t buy happiness and
in
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
they are able to have
time
Use synonyms
for family, friends and entertainment.
A research
Correct article usage
Research
show examples
done by
psychologist
Correct article usage
the psychologist
show examples
department
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
Kenyatta University shows that 50% of children with mental illness are found in
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
who are in transit.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
factor is crucial as having more
money
Use synonyms
thus
Linking Words
should be taken into account. In conclusion, let have
time
Use synonyms
for work and our family as both are important aspects.
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree
money
Use synonyms
is important but
time
Use synonyms
cannot be pulled back once gone.It is
crusual
Correct your spelling
crucial
to balance both
time
Use synonyms
and
money
Use synonyms
for a healthy and happy life
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • facilitating
  • lifestyle
  • professional development
  • increased stress
  • work-life balance
  • hobbies
  • quality time
  • physical and mental health
  • financial constraints
  • luxury items
  • overall well-being
  • personal growth
  • middle ground
  • sacrificing
What to do next:
Look at other essays: