Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #information #research #business #world

There is a

wonderfull

Correct your spelling

wonderful

saying that says, 'all good things are meant to be shared with

someone'

Correct your spelling

someone

show examples

. I

truely

Correct your spelling

truly

believe in

this

philosophy that we should always share things, knowledge or information to help other people.

These

Change the determiner

This

show examples

view is contradicted by two types of human beings in our society. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

we will talk about these humans as well as

outweight

Correct your spelling

outweigh

one opinion over the other.

Firstly

, I would like to mention that my parents taught me from a very young age that I should always share everything with others. Nothing in

this

world

is ours permanently.

Inspite

Correct your spelling

In spite

of trying to achieve personal gains for some research or a business trick or academics, we should always try to help other people who are interested in improving

himself

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

herself

Correct pronoun usage

themselves

show examples

. My point to prove here is, as we are gods most unique and gifted creation, we should never forget

Correct your spelling

our

show examples

out

Correct your spelling

our

show examples

roots and try to leave

this

place a little better after us.

For instance

lets

Replace the word

let's

let us

show examples

talk about Sir Issac Newton. If he had never thought about gravity or discussed it and openly shared his research on gravity with the

world

, I am sure we would be living

Change preposition

show examples

a different age altogether.

Secondly

, there are many people who believe that if they kept an important thing

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a secret, it will help them attain their own selfish benefits to

get

Change the verb form

getting

show examples

one step

ahed

Correct your spelling

ahead

of their

competitor

Fix the agreement mistake

competitors

show examples

However

, they don't realise the most important thing in life that if they start sharing the valuable things with others, the

world

would be a better place to live and the amount of satisfaction that he/she will receive will

definately

Correct your spelling

definitely

outscore any other happiness in the

world

For instance

, I had a friend who would always score better in exams but whenever I asked him any doubt, he would act like he does not know the solution. Later, one day he asked me to teach him how to dance and

this

time I made up an excuse and left. In conclusion, it is always better to share knowledge with others, as

this

world

will turn into

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

place if we stick together as humankind and try to avoid our personal gains for the larger good in life.

Submitted by naman.gadhia on Thu Jul 29 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

371 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

information sharing
scientific research
business
academic world
advancement of knowledge
progress
collaboration
cross-disciplinary research
open access
democratization of information
transparency
credibility
intellectual property
security concerns
commercial interests

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