Some people say that children no longer need to go to school since everything can be learned online. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #school

Distance learning has been changed increasingly nowadays, and

this

trend is perceived differently by learners. Some

students

consider it as a convenient way for studying and

also

an improvement in learning techniques. But

beside

Replace the word

besides

show examples

the other think that it is not as

much

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

effective as classroom learning. In my opinion, I half agree and half disagree with it. On the one hand,

instead

of following these fixed schedules in the

school

, they can study in an online course which provides a flexible schedule and less expense for

students

. They

also

have opportunities to join their desired course and study

Change preposition

show examples

a suitable time too. From

that

Add a comma

,that

show examples

they are able to find out what we good at and gain more skills

such

as: self-study...

In addition

, learning online is a perfect solution when the world deals with these afflict problems.

For instance

, today the world is facing

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

lots of issues caused by Covid-19.

Therefore

everything needs a plan to deal with and so does the studying environment.

On the other hand

, even though there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

huge

Add an article

a huge

show examples

amount of information,

students

can not select and filter sources appropriately. While studying online without

parents's

Remove the s

parents'

show examples

guide,

students

tend to play games and that makes them do not concentrate on studying.

Moreover

, learning in

school

helps

students

to create more relationships and gives them chances to interact with both teachers and

Correct your spelling

fellow students

show examples

fellow-

Correct your spelling

fellow students

show examples

students

School

Add an article

The school

show examples

environment is not only just about learning but it

also

provides social skills and broadens student’s

horizon

Fix the agreement mistake

horizons

show examples

by organizing extra-curricular activities. To sum up, it is true to say that

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

helps our life be more comfortable and easy.

However

school

Add an article

the school

show examples

will not be replaced by

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

, as it has its own advantages which

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

can not

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

. ◦

Submitted by nhatrangthanyeu2013 on Fri Jul 30 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

288 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that children no longer need to go to school since everything can be learned online. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

The education of young people is the main priority in countries around the world. Some people believe that educating adults who cannot read or write is essential for the society and more funding should be made available for it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, people wear more Western-style clothes (e.g. jeans and T-shirts) than their traditional clothes. Why is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

Most people accept that we now live in a globalized world but not everyone agrees that this is beneficial. To what extent is globalization a positive or negative development?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?