Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is a spilt view about sports influence on the child. Some people believe that it gives the child a better

strength

to compete whereas another group of thinkers support that they learn how to work together. Both opinions have their own pros and cons.

Therefore

, before commenting on my view both opinions must be discussed. Examining the former sight about Physica activities teach pupils to get better in the competition, the prime reason is students who are found of a sport, they have a good sense of humour to win the match and

also

they learn how to come back in a bad situation.

For instance

, if a wrestler wins a match which he thought he was going to lose gives him good courage and he never ever think to give up until the

last

minute either it is a competition of sport or a challenge in life.

On the contrary

, the latter view suggests that it teaches students about how beneficial teamwork is because they involve in many games where team effort is the only way to win and for ,that they learn about the

strength

of togetherness. To add to

this

pupils will learn about each and individual skills and they

also

get an idea about how a group of pupils work together and defeat anyone.

Finally

, in my ,opinion I firmly support that teaching sport will give students to compete in any situation. The main justification is the child mental and physical

strength

will get enormous benefits from it.

For example

, children who learn outdoors activities will

also

learn to be patient. To conclude, there are many supporters of teamwork but my arguments prove that the development of mental

strength

is far beneficial than it

Add a missing verb

is.

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Submitted by hardiktrivedi27 on Mon Aug 02 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

289 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

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Many people believe that having fixed punishments for all crimes is more efficient way to deal with crime. whats your opinion?.

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