A large amount of advertisements nowadays are targeted at children. Many people say these have negative effects on children and should therefore be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays,
a great deal of
Change the quantifier
a lot of
many
plenty of
show examples
commercials
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are
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is
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designed so as to influence
children
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. while some people believe these
advertisements
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should not be stopped, I personally think they had better be prohibited. The opponents of banning child-related
advertisements
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, on the one hand, claim that
such
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adverts can be potentially useful. They argue that these
commercials
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could be informative for
children
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.
In other words
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, many companies use educational concepts to introduce their goods. By doing so, not only manufacturers benefit from
advertisements
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, but
also
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children
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will learn essential basics. Take Oral-B company,
for example
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, while it showcases its specific toothbrushes for
children
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in TV
commercials
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, it demonstrates the proper method of toothbrushing which can be of benefit for them.
Therefore
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, child-targeted
advertisements
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can have possible advantages. I,
on the other hand
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, believe
such
Linking Words
advertisements
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made for
children
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is better to be ceased as it can have harmful consequences on their health.
That is
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not to say that
,
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apply
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all food products are unhealthy, but the majority of them advertised in any way
such
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as chocolates, can have a serious adverse effect on a child’s well-being.
This
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stem from the fact that there are many food manufacturers trying to address
children
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to sell their products ranging from sugary drinks to fast food, leading to putting their future customers’ health at risk
such
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as obesity.
For instance
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, Coca-Cola recently has aimed at
children
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in its
advertisements
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, by incorporating a cartoon’s hero to draw their attention to its products.
Therefore
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, many
advertisements
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targeted at
children
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can be harmful to them. In conclusion, while some people insist that
commercials
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that address
children
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should be allowed as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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can have some merits, I personally think
such
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adverts had better prevent as they can have substantial negative impacts on
children
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physical health.
Submitted by Ashkan Mafi on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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