More and more parents are deciding to educate their children at home rather than sending them to schools. What are the causes of this phenomenon?

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Most
of
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apply

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the
Correct article usage
apply

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parents are not in favour
to educate
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of educating

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their children in educational institutes
instead
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they prefer homes. The main causes of
this
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trend are parents are more concerned about the health and safety of the offspring and parents have a busy schedule. I believe that it is a negative development because the youth will not learn to cooperate with
others
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in society. One of the major reasons for the change in
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people
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people's

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preference to educate their young ones from school to home is the busy routines of the father and mother.
This
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is to that these days
people
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don’t have time to look after their youth.
Therefore
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, they like to plan home tuitions for students when they are available at their places. The second reason is the safety of the child.
This
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implies that
due to
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the
covid
Correct your spelling
COVID

The word covid doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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situation, it is not safe for the young to go outside the house because there are high chances of getting the infection. So, everyone likes to make their children study online from home.
For example
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, in India, during the
pandemics
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pandemic

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, most of the schools are conducting their classes digitally to think about health concerns. It is negative progress in society because the new generation would not
able
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be able

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to learn
work
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to work

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

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with
others
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.
This
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is to say, when students
would
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apply

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study in their comfort zone
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then
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apply

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they
would
Verb problem
do

There may be a verb use issue here.

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not have any interaction with the outside world and because of,
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they
could
Verb problem
are

There may be a verb use issue here.

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not able to learn
socializing
Wrong verb form
socialise

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb socializing. Consider changing it.

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with
others
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and how to work in a team, which is a mandatory ability to progress in future .
For instance
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, as compared to older
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, the new generation always thinks about their personal benefits than society and
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

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not
like
Correct your spelling
likely

The word like doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to prefer communicating with
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Use synonyms
others
Correct quantifier usage
other

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members of the community. In conclusion, the reasons for shifting preference to study from institutes to homes are the hectic schedules of the guardians and the health safety of the
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids

It seems that kid may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. I think that it is a negative change because young
people
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

would not
able
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be able

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to adjust to teamwork and learn to cooperate with
others
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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coherence cohesion
The essay needs to improve on the structure so that the points flow seamlessly from one to another. There were a few instances where it got a bit confusing to keep track of the point being made.
task achievement
Try to improve the level of detail given in examples. They seemed a bit generic. Being more specific or personal will help make the point more convincing.
grammatical range accuracy
Avoid repetitive vocabulary and structure of the sentences to enhance your lexical resource score. Also, ensure grammatical correctness.
task response
Overall, the essay provides a comprehensible argument with reasoned points. However, there is scope for improvement in clarity and detail.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • phenomenon
  • educate
  • traditional schools
  • personalized
  • flexible
  • quality
  • safety
  • religious beliefs
  • ideological beliefs
  • negative experiences
  • education system
  • online resources
  • educational materials
  • individual strengths
  • individual weaknesses
  • bullying
  • social pressures
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