IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

the graphs shows the international users of internet from 2010 to 2017.

the graphs shows the international users of internet from 2010 to 2017.
The graphs illustrate the usage of
internet
Use synonyms
 by the Denny Johns between the years 2010 and 2017 and the percentage of web customers in the world in 2018 .The data has been calibrated in millions.
Overall
Linking Words
 ,the number of web customers were rising during the period,
whereas
Linking Words
 in the USA and
Canada
Add a comma
,Canada
show examples
 the maximum percentage of people were using the
internet
Use synonyms
 in 2008. In 2010, worldwide
internet
Use synonyms
 purchasers were evaluated
around
Change preposition
at around
show examples
 26 million which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 increasing gradually up to the year 2014 at 195 million.After that, a sudden escalation was seen in the
internet
Use synonyms
 operators in the years 2014 and 2015.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there was seen an increment in
internet
Use synonyms
 service consumers from 2015 to 2017. Turning to a pie chart, the US and Canada consumed the maximum proportion of the
internet
Use synonyms
 in 2018.
moreover
Linking Words
, the number of people using the
internet
Use synonyms
 in Europe was less than a quarter of the total users in the world.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Asia, the Pacific and South America collectively contributed more than 1/5 of the total percentage,
whereas
Linking Words
 the Middle East and Africa had the least
internet
Use synonyms
 users in 2018.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover, whereas".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words internet with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: