The availability of entertainment such as electronic games on portable devices is harmful to individuals and the society they live in. Do you agree or disagree?

#availability #entertainment #games #devices #individuals #society

Nowadays, electronic

games

on portable gadgets are increasingly popular with residents and it is believed that

this

kind of entertainment is harmful to people and the society they live in. I totally disagree with

this

opinion due to some reasons I mentioned below. On the one hand, video

games

can bring some considerable benefits for players. The

first

notable advantage is that they are an incredible way for labourers to relax after hard-working hours. The reason lies in the fact that

this

mean of entertainment is one of the most effective methods for players to blow off some steam.

Therefore

, there were a vast number of companies putting plenty of gaming portable devices in their office to help their employee to recharge the battery.

In addition

this

type of relaxation

also

is a mentionable source of knowledge for individuals. An example can be seen in

Vietnam

, where many students spend a lot of hours playing DOTA a game having an American context, these students could absorb information about American history and improve their English.

On the other hand

, electronic

games

on portable gadgets

also

bring about some demerits for society.

Firstly

, they are a wonderful source of income for the national economy, which is because, in

this

time when the COVID 19 problem is still not entirely tackled, many industries have to witness a bad development, but the gaming industry is an exception. Specifically, in many regions having the lockdown, the citizens there can spend a bigger figure for time playing videos

games

, which leads to a wonderful improvement of gaming companies' profits.

Moreover

this

kind of relaxation

also

is a practical way for countries to introduce their culture to other foreign nations.

For example

Vietnam

has a game called 7554 which is about the

Vietnam

wars having a great success in the market

last

year.

This

game actually allowed

this

country's natural landscapes and culture to be known by players over the world,

therefore

Vietnam

saw a sharp increase in the development of national tourism. In a nutshell, it is true that video

games

may create both positive and negative impacts on citizens and society.

However

, I am of the opinion that we can gain a lot of significant benefits from

this

kind of entertainment as long as we are fully aware of the potential threats.

Submitted by DrWho on Wed Aug 11 2021

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

387 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

detrimental
adverse
excessive
physical and mental health issues
dependency
hinder
social skills development
academic performance
productivity
real-life experiences
social interactions
addiction
gambling
harmful behaviors

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The availability of entertainment such as electronic games on portable devices is harmful to individuals and the society they live in. Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

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