The availability of entertainment such as electronic games on portable devices is harmful to individuals and the society they live in. Do you agree or disagree?

#availability #entertainment #games #devices #individuals #society

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, electronic

games

Use synonyms

on portable gadgets are increasingly popular with residents and it is believed that

this

Linking Words

kind of entertainment is harmful to people and the society they live in. I totally disagree with

this

Linking Words

opinion due to some reasons I mentioned below. On the one hand, video

games

Use synonyms

can bring some considerable benefits for players. The

first

Linking Words

notable advantage is that they are an incredible way for labourers to relax after hard-working hours. The reason lies in the fact that

this

Linking Words

mean of entertainment is one of the most effective methods for players to blow off some steam.

Therefore

Linking Words

, there were a vast number of companies putting plenty of gaming portable devices in their office to help their employee to recharge the battery.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

type of relaxation

also

Linking Words

is a mentionable source of knowledge for individuals. An example can be seen in

Vietnam

Use synonyms

, where many students spend a lot of hours playing DOTA a game having an American context, these students could absorb information about American history and improve their English.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, electronic

games

Use synonyms

on portable gadgets

also

Linking Words

bring about some demerits for society.

Firstly

Linking Words

, they are a wonderful source of income for the national economy, which is because, in

this

Linking Words

time when the COVID 19 problem is still not entirely tackled, many industries have to witness a bad development, but the gaming industry is an exception. Specifically, in many regions having the lockdown, the citizens there can spend a bigger figure for time playing videos

games

Use synonyms

, which leads to a wonderful improvement of gaming companies' profits.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

kind of relaxation

also

Linking Words

is a practical way for countries to introduce their culture to other foreign nations.

For example

Linking Words

Vietnam

Use synonyms

has a game called 7554 which is about the

Vietnam

Use synonyms

wars having a great success in the market

last

Linking Words

year.

This

Linking Words

game actually allowed

this

Linking Words

country's natural landscapes and culture to be known by players over the world,

therefore

Linking Words

Vietnam

Use synonyms

saw a sharp increase in the development of national tourism. In a nutshell, it is true that video

games

Use synonyms

may create both positive and negative impacts on citizens and society.

However

Linking Words

, I am of the opinion that we can gain a lot of significant benefits from

this

Linking Words

kind of entertainment as long as we are fully aware of the potential threats.

Submitted by DrWho on Wed Aug 11 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

387 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

detrimental
adverse
excessive
physical and mental health issues
dependency
hinder
social skills development
academic performance
productivity
real-life experiences
social interactions
addiction
gambling
harmful behaviors

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?
While it is a fact that online platform network play pivotal roles in our social and professional lives. Admittedly, it is not always precise that failing to actively access digital networking system might lead the professionals missed their golden oppurtunities in career life.
5.5
band
Violence in playgrounds is increasing. However, it is important that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays, Violence when still children is increasing, therefore, parents should be very careful to teach their offspring not to hit back at bullies. I will provide a clear example from my knowledge or experience about this topic.
7
band
With access to internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree?
Cybercrimes have increased tremendously over the last few years with the development of information technology and internet in particular. With the usage of the internet and social media platforms, youngsters are becoming the first victims of these crimes which leads to serious problems. I strongly agree with this notion that parents should keep track of everything their children browse and give only limited access to these channels. The below paragraphs will support my ideas -
5
band
There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Currently, it is completely complicated to perform successfully at school due to the overload schedule, and some individuals argue that subjects that are in a second priorities, such as sport and bakery time, need to be removed from the curriculum activities in order to give pupils space for studying their main subjects, while I completely disagree with this statement, because headteachers must give them opportunity to do whatever they aim to learn from school boundaries.
8
band
Your recently visited a store and didn't like the customer service there. Write a complaint letter to the store manager and say -What was the issue there? -Why wasn't the staff helpful? -Suggest what can be done about it
I am writing to complain about the services I received last week when I visited your shop at Kotara.

The availability of entertainment such as electronic games on portable devices is harmful to individuals and the society they live in. Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?

Violence in playgrounds is increasing. However, it is important that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

With access to internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree?

Your recently visited a store and didn't like the customer service there. Write a complaint letter to the store manager and say -What was the issue there? -Why wasn't the staff helpful? -Suggest what can be done about it