IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Modern technology is used in many workplaces today. How do you think technology changed the ways people work? Do yọu think there any disadvantages of relying on technology at work? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Nowadays, modern technology is used in different fields of activity, from offices to schools.
This
Linking Words
 trend had an important impact on the ways
people
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 and how they
work
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 Technology brought many advantages, it has
also
Linking Words
 come up with several disadvantages.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the reliance on technology in terms of advantages and disadvantages. On one hand, computers and
auto machine had
Replace the word
automation have
show examples
 made a lot of
work
Use synonyms
 easier. Machinery has begun to replace almost everything; there is no longer a need to count, fill out, or invent anything. Nowadays, almost no
work
Use synonyms
 can be done without the help of new
technologies
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in an accountant's job, before the advent of modern smart machines,
people
Use synonyms
 did everything themselves, counted huge numbers, and worked with paper. Everything is much easier now, and it really does make
life
Use synonyms
 easier. And so in every job, smart
technologies
Use synonyms
 can even save a person's
life
Use synonyms
. In the world of medicine, smart assistants are
also
Linking Words
 used, without which
work
Use synonyms
 would be much more difficult. In some countries, robots are already replacing surgeons,
not to mention
Linking Words
 their simple benefits in the daily
work
Use synonyms
 period.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 are starting to have health problems. At least scoliosis may develop, but the vision problems are incredibly significant.
For example
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
 all day at the computer, what good will it do for their health? Absolutely nothing. And if the power goes out or there are problems with the Internet, the whole system can crash.
People
Use synonyms
 will have to write everything down again, restore it, and there will be a lot of assignments ahead.
Overall
Linking Words
 ,the
technologies
Use synonyms
 of our century are very useful for
people
Use synonyms
, both at
work
Use synonyms
 and in everyday
life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, everyone is different, and some are satisfied,
while
Linking Words
 others are not, with the innovations in our lives. In my opinion, human
life
Use synonyms
 has only been made easier
as a result
Linking Words
 of new
technologies
Use synonyms

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Make a clear plan. Start with a short intro that states your view. Then two body parts: one for good points and one for bad points. End with a short conclusion that says your view.
vocabulary
Use simple words. Keep to basics like work, help, health, risk. Avoid hard phrasing.
cohesion
Link ideas with easy short words: also, but, however, for example.
development
Give one clear example for each point. Do not try to say too many ideas in one line.
grammar
Check for grammar. Fix common errors in tense and plural forms and keep sentence form clear.
content
The writer tries to cover both good and bad sides of tech at work.
examples
There are real examples from work fields like accounting and medicine.
scope
The essay states a view that tech makes work easier.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: